Her James
by Eets
Summary: After a night of drunken admissions, Lily Evans realises just how much her James Potter means to her. LxJ one shot.


**A/N: **I do not own any of these characters except Francesca 'Chessy' Corsellini and Rachy Jones!

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Drunken admission

"Shots shots shots!" Sirius Black chanted, banging his fist on the table already more than slightly tipsy. Lily Evans, the only sober one of the seven, shook her head vigorously and made to grab the two full bottles of Firewhisky that stood on the table. However, even under the influence of a lot of mead, James Potter was still quicker than her and scooped the bottles into his arms. Lily turned angrily towards him and made to grab the bottles back but, craftily, he shoved them quickly into the front of his jeans and slurred "Come and get 'em Evansh!" knowing full well that she wouldn't go near him. The rest of the group roared in triumph.

Remus waved his wand and, whilst he manged to transfigure seven shot glasses, he also created a snail and a hairbrush. James burst into noisy giggles, finding the sight of the snail too funny for words. "This is ridiculous. I cannot and will not allow you to do Firewhisky shots in the Heads' Common Room! I can't believe I even let you drink that mead..." Lily shook her head, wondering at the generosity she had shown earlier that evening. They had made it sound so reasonable.  
"But it'sh Christmas Evansh!" Peter cried, his voice an octave higher than usual. It sounded a lot less convincing now, Lily noted ruefully.

"How 'bout Truth and Dare. But you gotta drink a ssshot everytime it'sh your go?" Sirius suggested. Chessie sat up, nodding her agreement and accidentally kicked Rachy in the head. The latter promptly burst in to tears, proper racking sobs. Lily leapt to her side, cursing her friend for being an emotional drinker.

By the time she had calmed Rachy down enough to check up on the others, they had already reached Chess. Lily could only watch in dismay as her friend downed the shot without wincing and announced "Dare!"

Remus cackled to himself "Dare you to write a love note to Lucius Malfoy and send it now." Chessie grinned back and grabbed a piece of parchment and a quill.

_My dearest Lucius,_

_I can contain my true feelings no longer. I fear I may have fallen in love with you; I cannot stop myself noticing the way the light shines upon your beautiful golden hair, or the way your azure eyes sparkle when you laugh. I know you are with Narcissa Black now but I promise you Lucius, leave her now and you won't regret it... I don't care what my fellow Gryffindors think anymore, please Lucius, our love is stronger than the prejudices our families hold (however, I am actually 100% pure blood pedigree. Give me time and I'll show you...). Lulu, I need you. I am so sorry for hiding my true feelings from you for all this time._

_All my love,_

_Chessie x_

James, who had only just gotten over the hilarity of the snail, now nearly wet himself laughing over the note. Chess clumsily attatched the note to Lily's owl and sent it through the open window.

"Poor Lucius, he'sh always ashking Chessie out and now he'sh going to be so d-disappointed!" Rachy was in floods again. Lily rushed to comfort her, noting with a sense of dread that Sirius had now grabbed the bottle and slung back a rather large shot of alcohol.

Lily returned to the game minutes later with a vague hope of getting them all to bed and confiscating that damned whisky. "Tell ush something you've never told no one in thish whole sheven of us!" Sirius rambled, gesturing to the group but talking to James. James stood up on the plush scarlet armchair and bowed to the room, waving his arms grandly and announced "I shagged Trisha Reynholm in Sixth Year!" He grinned with pride and waited for the round of applause. There was silence. All eyes turned to Lily. She said nothing. She tucked a few loose strands of deep red hair behind her ears and walked to her dorm.

"Trisha? Really? She's not your type is she Prongshie?"

"BUGGER."  
"Jeez Prongs. My head is in agony, did you have to awaken me so rudely?" Sirius moaned from where he was sprawled on the floor of James' dormitory; Chessie stirred next to him and covered her eyes. Remus sat up groggily from the sofa, Peter made a small whimpering noise.  
"Please... Oh please, Merlin, tell me I did not announce something I really should not have announced last night." James muttered, his hands clenched together in a prayer-like motion. Chess winced as the light from the open window hit her eyes but said "Sory James mate, Rach went after her but never returned. I assume it was bad."  
James groaned.

Several cups of coffee later and the five made their way down to the Great Hall to meet Rach for a rather late lunch. James was on edge, eyes darting round the room, anxious that he might spot or be spotted by that angry redhead. Sirius knocked him on the shoulder "Relax James. Please, you're making me feel sick all twitching about." But James would not stay still.  
"She could attack me, from anywhere! She will use the element of surprise to make whatever's coming my way even more painful and humiliating... I have to be alert, awake, on edge. UNAGI!" he yelled suddenly, causing Peter to drop his enormous sandwich.  
"Unagi? What the..." Chess murmured, cringing at the sight of Peter's food.

James stopped his frenzied movement abruptly, instead sitting stock-still and staring grimly at the doors that lead to the Entrance Hall. Through the doors slipped Lily Evans, her trademark mane tied back neatly, walking arm in arm with Alice Prewitt.

She just looked… neutral; not angry, not calm – just listening to Alice chatting about her new shoes, nodding and offering her opinion. As she walked past the group, Lily offered a small but seemingly genuine smile.

James slumped in his seat, head on the table. "She hates me." His voice came muffled from under his arms. Rachy poked him gently "Lils looked okay. She smiled, at least. When I sat with her last night, she actually wasn't too mad. I don't think. I can only really remember about a quarter of last night anyway…" She broke off, rubbing her temples.

James did not look convinced. "Well, we'll find out tonight won't we? Head duties: we have our patrol…"

There was, on her part, no awkwardness when they set off. She spoke laughingly of last night's antics whilst he squirmed uncomfortably.

"Did you see Lucius's face at dinner time, when Chess walked in? Merlin! So funny, weren't you dying of laughter James? Jaaames?" Lily stuck a hand in front of James's face and waved frantically, grinning. He balked and paled slightly, faced with the fast movement.  
"Haven't recovered yet, Jimmy?" Lily laughed, her cat-like eyes bright.

Maybe it's all some sort of hideous mind-game, James thought as he forced a chuckle and continued the walk. His face remained in a confused frown for the remainder of their duty although he joined in with Lily's mindless babbling. You know, he noted, I quite like this form of Lily-torture, smiles and chatter… By far preferable to the screaming-rampage. 9/10, Evans – nice one.

The awkwardness, however, returned as they ambled into the Head's Common Room. For all of Lily's gossiping, she couldn't talk away the issue that hovered between them.

"Shall I go to the kitchens quickly and get some food?" James's query was met with silence. "Or won't this be taking too long?"

"Will what be taking too long?" Lily inquired, not meeting his eye. She scuffed the edge of the rug with her Doc Martens and perched on the arm of one of the scarlet sofas.

"Lily, it was great of you to try and change and act like you're not that mad at me but I _know_ you and this is definitely one of those mad, ragey, screaming moments. The ones we all know and love?"

Lily smiled slightly to herself before looking up at James. He was standing uncomfortably, one hand hanging out of his jeans pocket and one in his mass of hair. He was staring right at her but with a sheepish, apologetic look on his face. A look that Lily knew very well, a look she had often conjured up in her mind, late at night, no matter how hard she had tried not to think about him. She smiled again.

"James, Sixth Year. I really am not acting here - trust me, if I was mad, you would sure as Hell know about it." She paused to study his face again. More confusion than sheepishness now. "Sixth Year. I thought you were the world's biggest prat back then. I thought you were shagging half the school, you didn't tell _me_ anything new last night."

James shifted awkwardly "That's not true, I didn't shag half the school. Hardly anyone, actually."

"Look, my point is James, that you changed didn't you? Between Sixth and Seventh Year something, Merlin knows what, happened to you and you morphed into the James that I… Y'know, _my_ James – wait, not MY James but you know what I mean…" She broke off, cursing under her breath and resumed her staring match with the rug blushing.

James looked at her sharply. Please, he prayed, don't let me stuff this up, this could be the moment I've been waiting for practically four years now. Please…

"I have changed. Not necessarily _for_ you, it's just something that tends to happen with time y'know. But… I _can_ be your James, if you want me to be."

He held his breath as Lily stared at him, her face unreadable from where he stood. She stood up, quietly and slowly, smoothing her skirt down and pushing her hair back. She closed the small distance that separated them before gently placing her hand on his face.

"I do, James."

A few weeks later they sat in the Gryffindor Common Room studying, under Lily's command, for the practice NEWT exams.

"Just how I wanted to spend the day, flicking through dusty Transfiguration textbooks. How romantic!" James laughed, his lips against Lily's ear. She waved him away and pulled her quill towards her, ready to take notes.

"Lils! Don't be such a bore. Why don't we do something more interesting? Like… snog?"

"Because we sure don't do enough of that James…"

"How about a good old-fashioned talk then?"

"About what?"

"Why did you change your mind?"

"About you? I've told you it was-"

"No, about the whole 'Trisha Reynholm' thing. Don't deny it Lily, I may have been pissed as they come when I said it but I remember your face."

"Yes, at first I may have been a little… put-out." Lily admitted, staring at her blank parchment. "But I was in bed, thinking about you and what you'd said and I realised."

"Helpful, Lily. Realised what, stupid?"

"Realised everything. Realised that I was so bothered by your… personal business because I was jealous. Realised just how much I cared about you. And I realised that the James that did that, the James that made me want to roll my eyes and utter the words 'immature prat' hadn't been seen for a long time. You were my James now."

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**A/N:** Hope you enjoyed it. Reviews are the best thing ever and make me VERY happy, it doesn't take long so fancy doing one? Thanks!


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